American exceptionalism may have gotten us to the moon and back, but when it comes to actually
mooning
each other (you know, on the beach), we're not exactly world-beaters.
Europe, by contrast, is in a completely different league when it comes
to shoreline skinny-dipping.
Maybe it's their
permissive attitude toward public nudity. Maybe they just understand that tan lines are as offensive as
taking selfies on the shore. Whatever the reason, topless (not to mention full-on nude) beaches in Europe are plentiful.
But which ones are really worth your vacation days? We narrowed the
list down to 18 of Europe's greatest beaches to see and be seen -- in
the buff, of course.
Playa de Ses Illetes -- Formentera, Spain
Located just south of legendary Ibiza, the island of Formentera's
basically a smaller cousin -- so small, in fact, that there's no
airport. You’ll need to take a ferry, bus, or taxi to get here.
Once you do, however, you'll be greeted by a wealth of gorgeous beaches,
each of which is nude-friendly. Playa de Ses Illetes is one of the most
popular, and with its powdery white sand and azure waters, it's easy to
see why.
Filaki Beach -- Crete, Greece
Crete's known for its staggeringly beautiful beaches, and Filaki's one
of the standouts. A secluded stretch of sand stocked with sun beds,
umbrellas, and a snack bar, Filaki's only a 15-minute walk from
Vritomartis, a naturist resort said to be
one of the best in Greece.
If that wasn't enough, wrap your head (or unwrap your towel) around
this: Filaki's one of the few nude beaches on the island of Crete that's
officially recognized as such. So you have permission to disrobe in
peace.
Ahlbeck Beach -- Usedom, Germany
Nicknamed Sunny Island, this Baltic Sea spot is split between Germany
and Poland and boasts more average sunlight hours than just about any
other spot in either country. So, it's basically made for nudists in
search of the perfect tan. Ahlbeck Beach is located near the island's
trio of popular seaside resorts (or Imperial Spas, as they're known).
Plage de Tahiti -- St. Tropez, France
Apart from sitting squarely on the French Riviera's warm Mediterranean
shoreline -- which equals impeccable sand and turquoise waves -- Plage
de Tahiti's infamously popular among celebrities. Which means that while
you'll likely catch an eyeful of some random Frenchmen's cash and
prizes, getting a glimpse of Miranda Kerr's VS qualifications is also a
distinct (and much more appealing) possibility.
Leucate Plage -- Leucate, France
In addition to being one of France’s well-regarded shores for
skinny-dipping and nude sunbathing, the half-mile long Leucate Plage
also sports two naturist resorts and a clothing-optional campground. In
other words, there's a healthy balance of naked tourists and
bare-bottomed locals.
There'll obviously be some fully clothed party poopers as well -- "textiles", as the Euros call 'em -- so if you're a
Never Nude, you can probably still have some fun here as well.
Es Trenc -- Majorca, Spain
Spread out along Majorca's southern coast, Es Trenc's shallow waters are
ideal for nudists who weren't planning on doing much swimming anyway.
While the restaurants and parking are a bit overpriced, this spot is all
about saying goodbye to that bikini line.
Paradise Beach -- Mykonos, Greece
Depending on when/where you go, the bodies on this stretch of beach can
either be fully clothed, topless, or completely bare, and the crowd run
the gamut from college coeds to septuagenarians, all looking to have a
good time. Between Paradise's picturesque shoreline and its two wild
beach bars (Tropicana and the Sunrise Bar), there’s something for
everyone here.
Patara Beach -- Patara, Turkey
Patara's the longest beach on the Turkish Riviera, and features the
requisite soft sand and warm, shallow water of all the world's truly
great shorelines. It's also a protected nesting site for sea turtles,
meaning that: a) the odds of slashing your foot on a carelessly
discarded broken bottle are pretty slim; and b) you should be completely
comfortable with turtles seeing you naked.
Playa El Torn -- Catalonia, Spain
At almost a mile in length, El Torn's no slouch when it comes to size
(although we can't attest to the motion of its ocean); so you'll have
plenty of personal space even when the locals and tourists descend. As
it's a protected beach, it's cleaned regularly and the police patrol the
area to make sure nobody's dumping empty Fanta bottles in the dunes.
Buhne 16 -- Kampen, Germany
Located on the eastern shore of Sylt Island, Buhne 16 is considered
Germany's oldest nude beach. And even though plenty of other local
beaches are also nude-friendly, Germans and tourists still flock to
Buhne 16 for its history and laid-back atmosphere. Striped blue and
white chairs are sprinkled liberally about, so get there early enough
and you're pretty much guaranteed a seat.
Vecaki beach -- Vecaki, Latvia
What you may not know about Latvia (despite having watched that
episode of Seinfeld many
times) is that the country's coast is over 300 miles of pure,
uninterrupted Baltic beach -- not bad for a country the size of West
Virginia.
Just north of Latvia's capital is the country's biggest naturist beach
-- the nude-friendly portion of shoreline spans from Vecāķi to Kalngale,
and is also popular among locals as a beach volleyball spot. That's
right: Naked Latvians playing beach volleyball. We'll leave it at that.
Red Beach -- Crete, Greece
The second Cretan spot on the list, Red Beach boasts breathtaking red sandstone cliffs,
a fascinating history,
and not-at-all-shy locals. Going during the peak of summer, though? Be
warned: the place can have significantly fewer nude sunbathers,
depending on the inclination of tourists. If you'd prefer to be
surrounded by fellow nudists at all times, get there either earlier or
later in the season.
Playa de los Muertos -- Almería, Spain
The name (which translates to "Beach of the Dead") refers to the pirates
and sailors whose bodies washed up on the shore many moons ago. That's
in the past, though -- today, Playa de los Muertos is one of the
liveliest naturist beaches on the Iberian peninsula. Split by two coves,
the beach is more small pebbles than sand and the water's always
sparklingly clear.
Bellevue Beach -- Klampenborg, Denmark
Chockablock full of svelte Danish youths looking to party, Bellevue's
the spot to hit if you're in northern Europe and eager to channel your
dormant Spring-Break self -- assuming your Spring Break was spent on a
topless-optional/nude-friendly beach.
Cap d'Agde -- France
While it’s technically the name of an entire town, Cap d’Agde is
generally used to refer to a specific stretch of beach in a part of town
called the Naturist Quarter. More than just a beach, this part of town
is chock-full of shops, restaurants, nightclubs, and bars, all of which
are frequented by naked Europeans of all stripes. There’s also a
big swinger scene here, so be prepared if you go with your girlfriend.
Valalta -- Rovinj, Croatia
Located on a full-fledged naturist campsite, Valalta scores high in the
insane amenities department. Not only can you enjoy cocktails at the
swim-up bar; there's also a water slide at the pool and, best part, beer
tastings at the onsite brewery. And don't forget, there's nudity.
Spiaggia di Guvano -- Corniglia, Italy
Hidden from prying eyes behind the mountains of
Cinque Terre,
this pebbly little cove requires a bit of a schlep to reach -- like, a
down-the-mountains-and-through-a-pitch-black-tunnel schlep. Still, the
prospect of naked Italians and warm Mediterranean water should be enough
for you to don some hiking boots (and nothing else) to make the
journey.
Plage Linguizzetta -- Corsica, France
In addition to being Napoleon's birthplace, Corsica's also home to one
of the longest nude beaches in all of Europe; at 2.5 miles, the
clothing-optional section of Plage Linguizzetta's pretty much guaranteed
to never be fully crowded. Additionally, the stretch's peppered with a
number of local bars and eateries.
Gianni Jaccoma
is an editorial assistant for Thrillist Travel, and will be starting
the world's first compulsory bottomless beach in Jacksonville next year.
Follow him to uncomfortable mental images on Twitter @gjaccoma
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